CRUISE DELIVERS... A BOMB? - April 4, 2006
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Imagine the bullshit sensors going off at Hollywood, Interrupted when a press release from the German global delivery network DHL hit the wires trumpeting "a shipping and logistics partnership" with Paramount Pictures for Mission Impossible:3!

A quick check with a studio source revealed that DHL did do voluminous shipping and transportation work for Paramount on the special effects-driven train-wreck set to drop on May 5, but the DHL deal was, according to source, "pure product placement." "In other words," said the source, "DHL paid millions to Paramount for the opportunity of having Cruise appear on screen driving a stupid yellow DHL truck around Italy!" (Calls delivered to the DHL press office were not returned by post time from the company that promises, "We move the world!")

Sure, big corporate product placement partners often foot a large part of a movie budget, but you'll never see Burger King doing the actual catering on a film.

And what in the name of Xenu is the couch-jumping clown Tom Cruise doing in bed with a German company anyway?

Not only did the German government deny Cruise's 2004 request to shoot MI:3 scenes in the German Parliament building (the Bundestag), they also rightly refuse to recognize Cruise's space alien cult of Scientology as a bona fide religion.

Apparently, the heterosexual actor who stands to make a reported $60 million on this installment of the Mission Impossible franchise is determined to keep his bottom-line and back-end covered at all costs.

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Image Credit: Carolyn Pierce and Jon Tando.



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Comments

What is Cruise doing in bed with a German company? The same thing all whores are. Getting paid.

Posted by: Emily at April 4, 2006 03:23 PM

Tom Cruise could maybe have some acting books shipped express.

But seriously, it's getting insane now how much blatant advertising there is in movies today. A great example would be i robot. I just hope movies focus less on big profits one day and more on quality.

Posted by: Trevor Price at April 4, 2006 03:56 PM

The most recognizable Clam on the planet in now a spokesman (of sorts) for a major German company. Why is Cruise doing it? Because it normalizes the cult. Normalization is what they seek.

Keep in mind, Scientology wasn't recognized as a religion in America until Bill Clinton ordered the IRS to give it religious status in 1993. Germany's one executive decision from doing the same thing.

Scientology isn't about standing down. They'll get in any way they can. If it's not through the political door, or the court room door, it'll be through the corporate door. But one way or the other, they'll get into Germany. The last thing they want to do right now is alienate any Germany entity, especially one of its largest corporations, which employs tens of thousands of Germans.

I can't tell you why Cruise is doing it. But I know why the COS is letting him. Because it's good PR for them (at the very least), in a place where they desperately need it.


Posted by: davenwash at April 4, 2006 04:44 PM

Germans are a bit hesitant to admit that kind of influence again. Don't be rude.

Posted by: Emily at April 4, 2006 07:02 PM

Is this what passes for "breaking news" or a "big story"? This site sucks. How many more times is Tucker going to try to hype it up. Ebner "breaks the pat dollard story"!! hahaha what story did he break? Some douche bags comments? Wow, talk about rocking the press! What a joke.

Posted by: S bomber at April 4, 2006 10:05 PM

Sometimes it does seem Mark will use the slightest excuse to mention Cruise on his site. I wonder what he will come up with if MI3 is a success and not a "train wreck".

Posted by: Martin at April 5, 2006 03:52 PM

Martin - What with foreign sales and all,MI:3 is already a perceived success, but it will be fun watching them trying to recoup the $260 million dollars they already put into this blaspemic take on the original series. Anyway, huge summer tent-pole movies are usually train-wrecks in terms of quality anyway. Did you happen to see Titanic?

- Ebner

Posted by: Mark Ebner at April 5, 2006 03:59 PM

Regardless of where anyone personally stands on the war, there is a reality of the job that young U.S. men and women are carrying out everyday that we don’t see. I’ve known Pat for many years and, yes, he is a bit of a madman. While he has seen plenty of extremes in his life, the pursuit of this story has taken him far beyond what would have been expected. Certainly his decision to stay even after being injured was even more surprising. Dollard’s blog and views reflect the human instincts and reactions to the given situations. I look forward to seeing him come home safely to complete his work on this project. When it is finished I think the documentary and it’s first hand view of the efforts of those serving to improve the world around them will make a difference.

Posted by: FDD at April 5, 2006 08:14 PM

$260 million? The marketing push hasn't even started yet. By the time it's actually in theatres they'll have reached half a billion easily.

Posted by: slf at April 5, 2006 11:28 PM

Yes Mark, I have seen Titanic, unfortunately. But we both know Paramount made a boatload of cash on it and for the studios that's the bottom line.

Although I do enjoy some of Cruise's movies (loved War Of The Worlds actually) MI:1 and MI:2 are not among them. Still I'm putting 10 bucks down in May hoping MI:3 will break that trend.

slf - "$260 million? The marketing push hasn't even started yet. By the time it's actually in theatres they'll have reached half a billion easily." No, I believe Mark is about right. $150m production, maybe $100m marketing worldwide (ww)and throw in $10-20m pre and post production and I think you'd have it. A half billion is way too far out there.

If MI:3 is a success I don't doubt Paramount will double their investment or better. By success a benchmark of say $550-575m ww and the execs will put their feet up - even with paying Cruise's production company 20-25% of their take.

Only about half of the boxoffice cume would go to Paramount but if you consider rentals, dvd , pay TV, network TV and licensing, not to mention taxbreaks and product placement as Mark has mentioned in his article, then their profits will come. Edward Jay Epstien over on the Slate site has some good articles on the subject.

Posted by: Martin at April 6, 2006 05:13 PM

"$150m production, maybe $100m marketing worldwide (ww)and throw in $10-20m pre and post production and I think you'd have it. A half billion is way too far out there."

Just an example here: King Kong's total cost, including production and marketing, was over $500m. Production costs were well under $300m, closer to $250m. Marketing eats up a LOT of cash.

I'll split the difference and call it around $380m.

Of course, with the way accounting is done in Hollywood, we may never know the real numbers.

Posted by: slf at April 6, 2006 06:51 PM

Very good site, congratulations!

Posted by: invicta at April 13, 2006 07:12 AM

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